こんにちは。
今日は長めの英作文をご紹介します。
トピックは、感染拡大予防と経済活動 どちらを優先すべき?
私が事前に脳をしぼって書いた英作文を、当日先生に手直してしていただいたものをシェアします。
試験向けに書いたものではないのでやや長めですが、レベル的には英検®1級程度かと思います。参考になれば幸いです。
感染症予防 vs 経済活動
Introduction: 感染症予防と経済活動は trade-off
Some say that preventing the spread of viruses should be a priority, but others say that economic activities should never be sacrificed. At the heart of this issue is a trade-off: which of the two should take priority over the other? We need to strike a balance between the two factors. I believe that prevention of the spread of coronavirus should take priority for the three reasons explained below. |
Body1 都市部の高い人口密度による感染爆発
the high density of urban population tends to advance the spread of coronavirus. |
And once this happens, there is no way to slow or stop the infection rate, resulting in a paralysis of every aspect of society. |
Body2 人の高い移動性が前提となった経済活動のリスク
Second, it is all very well that globalization has enhanced the development of transportation and endowed people with greater mobility, but, unfortunately, due to this phenomenon, infectious diseases like COVID-19 have also become more transmittable than before. Given that economic activities always come along with such mobility, business activities, especially activities in the eating-out sector, should be restricted to stop causing another pandemic. |
パラグラフ最初の it is all very well…but は「~は多いに結構だがしかし…」という決まり文句。譲歩のかっこいいバージョンでしょうか。
endow 人 with (人に~を与える)
become transmittable (伝染する可能性がある)
Given that も英作文では if の代わりによく使われます。
eating-out sector (外食セクター)foodservice industryなんかも使えそうです。
Body3 医療崩壊のリスク
Last but not least, the absence of restrictions on economic activities tends to accelerate the spread of the virus and increase the number of people who get infected at one time, and would give rise to the risk of overwhelming our medical services. In fact, a number of European countries failed to take prevention measures at the early stage of the spread of the coronavirus and the resulting rapid increase in the number of patients overwhelmed the capacity of medical institutions. |
the absence of restrictions や accelerateはエッセイでヘビロテしそうなワードですね!
このパラグラフではエビデンスとしてヨーロッパでの医療崩壊の例を持ってきました。事実の提示なので In factを使っています。
Conclusion: 同じ形式で3つの理由をリステイト
最後のconclusionではBodyで述べた3つの理由をもう一度述べますが、この時形式をそろえることが大切と教わりました。
ここでは because of の後ろをすべて同じ形式の名詞句にしてリステイトしています。
To sum up, prevention of a rapid spread of coronaviruses should be a priority because of high population density in modern cities, high mobility of people, and the risk of overwhelming our medical services. |
全部つなげてもう一度読んでみましょう
全体
Some say that preventing the spread of viruses should be a priority, but others say that economic activities should never be sacrificed. At the heart of this issue is a trade-off: which of the two should take priority over the other? We need to strike a balance between the two factors. I believe that prevention of the spread of coronavirus should take priority for the three reasons explained below.
First, the high density of urban population tends to advance the spread of coronavirus. And once this happens, there is no way to slow or stop the infection rate, resulting in a paralysis of every aspect of society, economic or otherwise. Second, it is all very well that globalization has enhanced the development of transportation and endowed people with greater mobility, but, unfortunately, due to this phenomenon, infectious diseases like COVID-19 have also become more transmittable than before. Given that economic activities always come along with such mobility, business activities, especially activities in the eating-out sector, should be restricted to stop causing another pandemic. Last but not least, the absence of restrictions on economic activities tends to accelerate the spread of the virus and increase the number of people who get infected at one time, and would give rise to the risk of overwhelming our medical services. In fact, a number of European countries failed to take prevention measures at the early stage of the spread of the coronavirus and the resulting rapid increase in the number of patients overwhelmed the capacity of medical institutions. To sum up, prevention of a rapid spread of coronaviruses should be a priority because of high population density in modern cities, high mobility of people, and the risk of overwhelming our medical services. (288 words) |
このレベルを楽に書けるようになりたいです♪